When Smart, Funny, and Nice are Not Enough

The tweet read, “Oh my, I think I followed this guy on twitter…” with a link to a local newspaper article. I nearly fell out of my chair when I read the name and realized that I knew him. Not well, but I had met him.

We had tweeted extensively, I had interacted with him and a few other guys on Skype, and I met him once at a bar with a group of buddies to discuss business ideas.

He died young, tragically, in a manner that makes for uncomfortable newspaper headlines.

He was smart. He was witty. He was motivated. He was respected. And underneath the veneer, something was horribly wrong.

I realized that I had not seen him on Twitter in months. I learned from a mutual friend that things had gotten rough for him lately. He was going through a divorce. Perhaps he faced the prospect of losing his son. I don’t know about his job.

I don’t know what was going on in his head. I don’t know the pain he was feeling, the depression he faced as his life seemed to crumble around him. During darker times in my past I wrestled with similar demons.

I could wail in pity for the friends and family left to wallow in their sadness.

I won’t, because I know their grief will abate and life will go on.

I could rant about the stigmas associated with mental health and the inadequate treatments available for its victims.

I won’t, because I believe there is a deeper, more fundamental disconnection that can’t be treated by Prozac or therapy, and life will go on.

I could bemoan a bankrupt and broken society that squashes the spirit of people who have much to offer in return.

I won’t, because that is not productive and I can offer no solutions to “fix” it, and life will go on.

I will pick my daughter up from her mom’s house in the morning.

I will grin when she comments on the colorful sunrise over the lake as I drive her to school.

And I will be grateful for my beat up car, the colors in the sky, and especially for the 15 minutes I have with the #Cuteness every weekday morning, for love is enough, and life goes on.

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5 Responses to When Smart, Funny, and Nice are Not Enough

  1. Deep appreciation for the goodness in our own lives is often the most respectful offering we can give in response to the pain of others. Yes, savor those sky colors and that little girl’s smile. What precious gifts they are!

    My condolences to all who are sorrowing over this tragic event.

  2. Maureen Francis says:

    I feel sad for the three other children left fatherless, that they will be left with so many questions unanswerable. My daughter and #cuteness are blessed to have loving fathers who think the world of their daughters.

  3. What a material of un-ambiguity and preserveness of precious
    familiarity concerning unpredicted emotions.

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